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The Pain: A Day Of Giving Thanks



Having been around, dated and lived with many transgender females in the past, it has provided me a with information that many are not privy to. Many of these so called Male to Trans are dealing with deep rooted issues that stem from lack of self worth, anger and frustration. They failed as men, fathers, husbands and in many other aspects of life. They had poor to no relationships with their fathers, some never got to meet them, and  now feel as if they cannot fulfill the role of manhood in life since they never were taught how.

The “dream” of being a woman is deep for many, its as if they wish they could run away from reality and their responsibility while “becoming” the other sex, thinking this will solve all their problems, but in reality, the problems only worsens and now they have to face the catastrophe they created and left behind.  The same pattern is seen in Female to Trans, with of coarse changing the roles and gender.

There is lots of pain in this community, pain that is not being addressed properly, instead some pseudo treatment that only creates bigger issues and enhances the problems in the end. On a day like today, there are many hurt trans identified individuals who miss being home with their families and friends, and may even be feeling regret. They are in so much pain they can’t even appreciate who and what they have around them. So my question is, was it worth it? Changing your gender marker can lead to bigger problems you ever anticipated, please think it through, because not only are you hurting yourself, you are also creating a title wave of hurt with every move you make.

I want to take this time to wish everyone a peaceful, love filled Day of Thanks, remember how many died for you to sit with your family today, how many gave up their land and home.  Let us be grateful for what and who we have in our lives today, cause tomorrow, you never know what brings.


About Mark Angelo Cummings

Maritza/Mark is walking the path of healing, she/he is a broadcaster, musician, writer, and educator. As a Certified Nutritional Consultant, Master Personal Trainer and Occupational Therapist, she/he has taken wellness one step further. Check out our website http://www.gypsybluenomads.com/ Follow our journey: The Travels of 2 Truth Seeker and Their Car. Check out our live Programing Tues & Thurs @ 6 PM MT on RealTalk With The Cummings https://www.youtube.com/c/GypsyBlueNomads


9 thoughts on “The Pain: A Day Of Giving Thanks

  1. This, a million times, this!


    Posted by Charlotte | November 26, 2015, 8:37 pm
  2. Reblogged this on Stop Trans Chauvinism.


    Posted by stchauvinism | November 26, 2015, 11:20 pm
  3. Of the trans people I have met, I have seen a lot of pain. However, I have not seen anyone thinking that transition will solve their problems. No doubt there are people who are borderline delusional and want to escape to another world through some other identity. If so, there are much easier ways than changing gender and undergoing a lot of painful procedures. Most people I know in transition do deal with ongoing pain and suffering, but most also express no wish to go back, and they also relay a sense of new freedom.


    Posted by Geena Amandus | November 26, 2015, 11:55 pm
    • How many have you actually met? I have personally known and interacted with hundreds, lived with and so on. I can safely say that after years pass, and its not if but when, there comes a time, that that inner voice kicks in; and although there is a wide range of time when this takes place, the day comes when the question is asked, was it worth it? Many don’t detransition, due to shame, afraid to lose what little friends they do have left, or they just don’t know how to go about it. The amount of detransitioners are vast, many do it in silence, but more are coming out.
      I respect your opinion and beliefs, but the research shows that an increase in suicide is seen after transition. http://www.transitionradio.net/imortant_link.html

      There needs to be better therapy and solutions.

      Liked by 1 person

      Posted by Maritza Cummings (Ritz) | November 27, 2015, 2:45 am
      • I have not run into any research that says that there is an increase in suicide rates. I have not been counting the number of transgender people who have transitioned or are transitioning, but I have seen them in clinical settings, and have met many, not even counting social media. Besides, how I met them is actually irrelevant if we are talking real assessment of the population. I am no longer even sure what the point is here. If it is to get people to not transition, or detransition, than you are feeding into a lot of hate out there of people who are highly oppressed. I can’t even begin to analyze the bias here, even among people with credentials, against trans folk. Also, what is transition? Is it seeing a therapist? Is it getting therapy post transition? Is it HRT? Surgery? The people I have met overall do not regret transitioning. That doesn’t mean depression, even suicidal ideation, isn’t there. No one I have talked to has ever wanted to go back whatever their misery. Contemplating reversal is one thing, wanting to det-ransition something else. Many wish they had not had gender dysphoria to begin with! That is true. I have read about ten people in the last month say they wish they had been born differently!

        If any here are advocating careful, soul searching and reasoning prior to transition, then I can only agree with you. If you are trying to scare people to stop, then I do not know how to begin to address that action.

        What research I have found indicates that the suicide rate (assuming that is a measure of misery!) Among transgender people post transition is higher than the general population. However, the suicide rate is even higher among the people pre-transition. A site that is dedicated to de-transition is not a good reference since it has the problem of selection bias. The final issue is why is there so much problems with “mental” illness among transgender people in general? How much of it issues from trauma due to a life of gender non-conformity and others reaction to it–gender non-conformity that starts as early as age four, even earlier for some.

        I do agree with your conclusion: there needs to be better therapy and solutions, what I question is the nature of therapy and the solutions. Just one case, that of Leelah Alcorn, brings to mind that therapy can also be a problem.


        Posted by Geena Amandus | November 29, 2015, 3:45 pm
      • Not only have I read about the increase in suicide after transition, but have personally known individuals whom after even SRS continued to be suicidal. Here is a link http://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC3043071/ also, because of the nature of the beast, gender dysphoria is not the issue in most cases these individual get worse do to messing with their endocrine system.

        What I am doing here is that as a once fierce advocate who promoted transitioning, I am now saying, halt buyer be ware. The real issue is not being looked at, gender dysphoria is but a cough to a cold. This is a neurological condition with many factors from depression, body dysmorphia, anxiety, anger, self esteem issues, feeling of not belonging and so on and it is being dealt with incorrectly. Telling a schizophrenic to jump off a roof top because they believe they are superman and handing them a cape is not the answer. There is no such thing as a female or male brain, you can’t just alter your body and take the opposite hormone and call it a cure.


        Posted by Maritza Cummings (Ritz) | November 29, 2015, 8:40 pm
  4. What a beautiful kind compassionate post!


    Posted by georgiakevin | November 27, 2015, 2:55 pm

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