I don’t think people are really aware of what is happening in my life, really, I Maritza Lopez have been a destructive force in my own life, for years, I never knew there was a way to heal or to be set free on the path of righteousness. Many of you know my story, but to recap, I was sexually abused from the age of 8 to 12, lead a lesbian lifestyle, drug addict, alcoholic, promiscuous sex life, and the ultimate escapism, transsexuality. I was not a believer and actually struggled with Christians and their beliefs, to now have come full circle and the only identity I have is being a daughter of God and a sister to Christ.
At one point I was known as a fierce advocate and now I am an enemy to this community, a community I started to question, way before God entered my heart, as if my conscious was speaking or should I say, God was speaking to me, and I knew that something very powerful was about to take place. I had a relationship with a man called Shawn, who thought he was a woman named Jessica, a trans female who like all others in this community stopped at nothing to make his fantasy a reality. Shawn left a wife and a daughter all to pursue his selfish desires. Shawn and I were together for 2 and half years, during this time, I really started questioning the integrity and viability of the trans mantra. Shawn was always anxious, smoked like a chimney, did not have any self-worth or cared about himself in any way, shape or form. Shawn was violent and loved to play the role of the victim, as most trans “woman” do, anything that affirms their delusion. I could no longer continue to live with Shawn and we parted ways, he, of course, was not to thrilled with the idea and made my life a living hell, trying to ruin my reputation with the community that I advocated for, for years. Looking back now, I really should not have cared about holding a good reputation with a community that is considered an abomination in God’s eyes. I truly feel that the ultimate slap for God is what Trans people do. I feel shame and disgust, in what I have done, but God is great and has forgiven all of my sins.
To be a Christians is not just accepting Jesus as our Lord and Savior, but to really let Christ into your heart and repair the harm that Satan has done. Redemption is a forever going process, healing, abstaining, reflecting, growing and surrendering to God’s will. The first step to healing is to admit you have a problem, once you recognize that the life you were living is not the life that God wants you to live, the healing then begins. Then you give the burden to God, you allow him (Jesus) to enter your heart, and start the restoration process. There are years of wounds, pain, dysfunction and self-hatred that needs attention, the attention that only Jesus knows how to give you. You have to be willing to trust him and to realize that it’s only through him that you can be healed. He will give you a new heart, you will become a new man or woman, then and only then will the reparative process unfold.
Remember one thing, there is absolutely nothing our King can’t do, you are his and he will stop at nothing till you are completely healed and redeemed. Do you trust in God? Do you know that you are incapable of knowing what to do and how to conduct your life in a manner that pleases him? He and only he can restore you to that state that your heart longs to be in. Don’t you believe me? Let me ask you this, are you really at peace with your life? Or do you constantly feel this void, this need for more, like something, is missing in your life, you are constantly struggling with addictions, with lacking of finances, love, and any wordly possessions? Take an inventory of your life, taking the truth serum, and removing your ego, and know that God is missing in your life, and once you let him in, you will be amazed. Trust me, I fought it for as long as I could. God heals, he is the only one that can fulfill everything in your life, every void, every pain, every need, he is the only one that can.
Till Next Time